it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Randomize
