So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Randomize
