Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
