Ambien. No doubt about it.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
