I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
