let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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