Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Alive.
So much puke
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
