i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Im part way to drunk.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
