just come out here and I will go home with you...
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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