Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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