tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
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My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
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