Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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