Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
you made out with another girl for some wings
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
