I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Im part way to drunk.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
