sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
