i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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