Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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