I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
