Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
