Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
