Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
