I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
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