Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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