He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
