well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
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