put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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