I just made out with a guy for $7.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I think we might need a safe word for this...
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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