And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
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Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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