So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
sarcasm needs its own font
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
