i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Randomize
