I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
