my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
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