the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.