Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
