P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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