wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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