is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
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