Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Randomize
