too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
