Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize