okay pat passed out under dana's car
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize