I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Randomize
