Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
