clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize