Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
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I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
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I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
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