my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize