i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize