So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
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