what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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