i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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