You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
