Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
